Mirror, Mirror on the Wall...

We are officially two weeks Post Op and things are BETTER THAN EVER... said no one in this household.

 

I am so thankful and grateful and appreciative and relieved and happy and all things good and rainbowie and unicornie about Andies surgery being successful and OVER. My little girl is fixed, and to describe the thoughts and feelings of that is impossible.

 

...............................BUT..........................................

 

We have a serious issue in this house that we must discuss. A baby not sleeping at night and not napping. The issue of my little girl, becoming THAT little girl that you see in the grocery store, screaming and stomping and throwing a tantrum. Yes Sir, that is Andie. I choose to be that parent who notices there is a problem, and to fix it before it gets out of control. Sure, she is just 6 months, but kids are SOOOO smart. They train us from day one, don't get it twisted.

 

Camden has been everything AMAZING as a baby, and he is starting to find himself as he ages, and we are also working on two alpha redheads living in the same house. That in itself is a whole OTHER story.

 

Camden spoiled me. Hands down, best scenario I could have hoped for when it comes to a baby. When people tell you that all kids are different, believe them. I didn't, I thought it was my amazing parenting skills that made Camden awesome. Meaning that every kid I would birth would be amazing because I was the mother and my hubs was the father.... NAAAA-OOPE! Lets be realistic. He was in daycare, I worked and he was parented by us for about 3 hours a night. Definitely was not us. Now that I stay home with my adorable little people, my experiment has proved that the problem is ME.

 

something has to change.

 

Have you ever looked in the mirror, desperately searching for answers within that piece of glass. I've done it a few times in my life. When I was trying to pump myself up for cheer try-outs, when I didn't understand why my boyfriend broke up with me, when I couldn't believe this is what 20 something looks like, when I was trying to figure out HOW I was going to be a mom, and then just recently, when I stared into my mirror, wondering how I got HERE. Here as in: a T-shirt, hair up, no make-up, tired, circles under my eyes, 1 Bachelors Degree and 1 Masters Degree not being used, a kid screaming, another baby refusing to sleep, a dog going bat shit crazy. I just stared and stared and wanted to know HOW in the WORLD did I let my life get out of control.

 

Then I realized, I could change this mess. I love being home with my kids, like with any job, I have to learn the ropes of doing it well. After time, Ill learn how to be a GOOD/GREAT stay at home mom, just like I had to learn how to be a decent teacher and counselor. To be honest, I am toying with the idea of going back to work. There are so many emotions that are tied to this decision. We will table that for another day.

 

The common denominator of all my issues and thoughts right now are that I am getting ZERO time for myself because my child will not sleep and my other kid, well he is 2. And we aren't allowed to go anywhere fun because Andie just had open heart surgery. So one mom skill at a time, I am going to master it and make our life better. here at the house. No one is happy in this house right now. Sure we are functioning, and laughing, but its unbalanced and not wholesome. Does this make sense?

 

So I asked, Mirror, Mirror on the Wall...how do I make this better... and you know what she did? She slapped my across the face and said.. STOP BEING LAZY AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT STOP COMPLAINING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

so I did.. I went to the almighty Facebook and called on my friends... I even prayed.. legit prayed and begged.. (that's another post.. me and the mans relationship..)... Those of you getting ready to have your first kid, or those of you who are on your 5th kid.. call on your mom friends. No mom is too seasoned to not need advice from friends. Without mine, I would be in the fetal position drinking a bottle of wine, hiding in my closet every night.

I am a person who needs things written out, step-by-step for me. Tons of friends sent me their kiddos schedules, with timed increments on when to go check on Andie. For that I will forever owe you candy!! Just when I thought I trained her, she trained me into ANOTHER problem.. the paci. UGH, whatever, Andie! So a friend, who is a Facebook friend (I have not met her, YET!) sent me a beautiful book. It has the SCIENCE behind how to sleep train, the pros, the cons, the variables, EVERYTHING. For a Science person, this was an early Christmas present.

We are on day one of the "Sleep Easy Solution", and my baby is napping. Napping exactly like the book described. I could see the results as they unfolded..It is a beautiful thing.

 

Hopefully, after all this madness is gone, I can write another post talking about how I sleep trained my kid. Those of you who have done this before me, you know how awesome it feels when your kid finally gives up and surrenders their sleep strike.

 

fingers crossed that she is finally learning who is the boss 'round here.

 

xo

Megs